one year ago today

One year ago today I woke up and began getting ready for my last workday of the week. Despite the 4 negative pregnancy tests I had taken in the two weeks leading up to this day, I still felt like I was pregnant. I had one pregnancy test left and decided to just go ahead and use it. Will was in the kitchen fixing cereal for breakfast and had no idea what I was doing. Within seconds the test showed two pink lines. I stood there in shock, tears filling my eyes. The baby we had been praying for for so long was finally in our life. I slowly walked out of the bathroom, holding the positive pregnancy test, ready to give Will the news. My face said it all. He was shocked, we were ecstatic and sat on the kitchen floor in disbelief of this greatest blessing.

Look where we are now. We have the most perfect baby boy and are happier than we ever dreamed. I can't even remember what life was like before Crew. He brings us so much joy and I can't wait to see where the next year takes us. Thank you, God for our son.

what i'm loving...thursday?

I had every intention of being a little nostalgic of my early blogging days and making this a "what I'm loving Wednesday" post...but the day got away from me and here we are. Between working full time and being a mom, I can't manage to blog on a daily basis - or even sometimes a weekly basis!

I started thinking about what I'm loving these days and all I could think of was my little family. Our life revolves around Crew and I  L O V E it. He is our greatest joy and I wouldn't want it any other way. In the WILW posts I typically write about things on my wish list. As I scrolled through my Amazon & Pinterest wish lists, I noticed a theme.... the things I want most are for Crew. Whether it's the cutest little baby man clothes, a new gadget to help him magically sleep through the night (which he's doing for the most part), or teethers for the upcoming months, it's all for my sweet baby.

I thought more and more on the things I'm loving lately until finally realizing that the items on my wish list aren't tangible. I wish I could work from home and be with Crew. I wish for him to continue to grow into a healthy, happy baby. I wish for Will's dream job. I wish to open an online business in the coming months and for it to be successful. I wish for quality time with my family. I could go on and on...

Another thing I'm loving today are these photos that Kelly & John took last weekend when they had Valentine's mini sessions. I was a little worried because Crew hadn't napped all day so he was tired, and not to mention cold, so he wasn't smiling too much. BUT K&J didn't disappoint as usual! Isn't Crew the cutest!? And yes, that is his hat on my head!

Our weekdays to go by slow and fast at the same time. After waking up around 5 or 6 a.m. to eat, Crew is typically asleep again by the time I'm leaving for work. I come home every day at lunch to feed him (if he's not napping) so by the time I get there and he eats, it's time for me to get back to work. I get home in the evenings around 5:30 and Crew usually goes to sleep by 7:30-8:30. After laundry, dishes, trying to work out a few times a week and showering, I'm ready for bed! I absolutely hate only getting to spend about 3 hours with him each day. It goes by too fast. It makes me so sad and I've really been struggling with it. We've really began praying about it and what's to come for our family. It's because of this that I don't blog as much as I used to. Time spent with Crew is so precious and I don't want to waste a minute of it. I LOVE HIM!

crew's newborn photos | 2

Part One

Crew's first outing was for the second part of his newborn photos. He was 8 days old and even though I was still pretty sore from giving birth, it was so nice for our little family to get out of the house for some fresh air!

How time flies!

crew's newborn photos | 1

I just realized that I never posted Crew's newborn photos. Kelly came over when he was 8 days old and took these. She was so patient with us. I never realized how long it would take for these photos. Crew and I and Will were all still getting used to each other and adjusting to our new life. We had to stop to eat a few times. Crew even had a couple (hilarious) accidents when we were trying the infamous naked baby photos. We are so lucky to have had Kelly there who is a great friend, but also incredibly patient!

video | crew's birth day

I finally finished compiling the videos from the day Crew was born! He was so tiny! I can't believe this was 6 weeks ago!

crew's birth story

Our doctor scheduled my induction for Thursday, October 3rd (I was 39 weeks, 4 days). We were scheduled to be at the hospital that morning at 5:45. The night before we were nervous, anxious and a still finding it hard to believe that we were about to become parents. I didn't sleep much that night (for obvious reasons). We got up on Thursday morning and got showered and ready to meet our baby!

We got to the hospital right at 5:45 and were checked in. I was then taken back to our room by myself to be admitted and hooked up to the IV and blood pressure cuff, etc.

I found out that I had been having contractions for at least 3-4 days already. Considering I had NO clue what contractions felt like, this was a surprise to me! (Just FYI, if it feels like your belly is getting tight all over, it's a contraction....it's not just the baby moving around! Ha!)

The nurse tried to check to see how much I was dilated. I had been 2cm/60% effaced the week before. For some reason she couldn't tell how much I had progressed because of how the baby was positioned. They kept saying something about him being posterior so it was harder to tell. 

They started me on Pitocin right away and things started progressing pretty quickly. After about an hour I started sweating and getting so hot. Will started fanning me with whatever he could find in the room. The nurse brought in a box fan later on.

During the second hour, I got so nauseous. Our pastor walked in the room to check on us right at the exact time I started throwing up. (Ironically, it was the ONLY time I threw up the entire pregnancy.) I felt terrible that he had to see that!

My back was hurting so bad during the contractions at this point. I was so ready for the epidural. My nurse also said she was going to give me something in my IV to "take the edge off." I was ok with that. What bothered me was that she didn't tell me it was going to basically knock me out all day. Everything after that was a major blur.

I was upset at first that they gave me that medication without telling me the affects of it. Looking back, I'm kind of glad that I got it because things like breaking my water and getting the epidural didn't hurt much and I was so relaxed.

 At 10:00 my doctor came in to break my water. By this point, I'll just say I was so relaxed because of that pain medication. I kept telling the doctor that I think my water already broke...and he kept reassuring me that it hadn't yet. I don't know what I was thinking! I remember him breaking it and it hurting...I think I was basically crawling up the bed when he broke it. Ouch.

This is when things got funny...at least according to Will. As I was in and out of sleep after my water was broke, I would ask Will, "Did they break my water yet?" He would say that they had and about five minutes later I would ask the same thing! (I'm telling you, that medicine knocked. me. out.) At least I could provide some entertainment for Will and Kelly. Unfortunately that meant they had to just keep answering the same question all day!

By 11:00, I was 4cm dilated. I got the epidural at some point, but I'm not sure of the exact time. Will was in the room, but they wouldn't let him stand next to me because they said there have been too many husbands end up in the ER after watching an epidural! It didn't hurt at all. I felt some pressure but that was it. Since the needle went to the left of my spine, I had to lie on my right side the rest of the day to "even out" the distribution of the medication. It was so uncomfortable to be on the right side all day. My back was killing me...and eventually my hips were too.

Will was such an amazing support system for me all day!

By noon, I was 6cm. Our parents came and visited, but I slept through most of it! (Again, that medication..)

My dad had on the same scrub shirt he wore when I was born with my footprints on it!

I had to wear the oxygen mask most of the afternoon because of Crew's heart rate. At 2:00, I was 9.5cm. My nurse said it was time to start pushing, but then she left the room (there were a lot of babies being born around the same time)...and I took an hour nap until 3:00 when she came back and woke me up.

Our nurse asked if I had taken any birthing classes. We told her we hadn't and she gave us about a 30 second run down on "how to push" and then we were ready to get the show on the road. She told me that I would probably be pushing for 2 hours. I got tired just thinking about pushing for that long and said a silent prayer that she was wrong. By 3:09, it was time to start pushing!

Around 3:20, the nurse left the room again for about ten minutes. (I have no idea why...she wasn't our favorite nurse during our hospital stay obviously.) At 3:30 she came back with the rest of the L&D team and our doctor. I couldn't believe we were about to meet our son!

A few more minutes into pushing and Crew's heart rate was dropping. I had been wearing the oxygen mask again in between contractions. They turned me on my side to see if that helped and it didn't. At this point I heard my doctor say something about having to "help the baby" out a little bit. I didn't know what he was talking about. Will & Kelly just kept reassuring me that everything was fine and not to worry. They saw the nurse wheel in the tray of scalpels and didn't want me seeing it and freaking out. The only thing I was thinking when my doctor said they would be helping the baby was the vacuum suction on his head and I was asking Will if that's what they were doing. He just kept telling me that everything was fine and not to worry. I was getting emotional knowing that in a matter of minutes I would finally be holding our baby boy.

I had to have an episiotomy (2nd degree) because Crew was getting stuck. As he was coming out, both our doctor and the nurses were commenting on how big of a baby he was! I had no idea just how big he would be! At 3:43pm on October 3rd, our precious baby was born.

It was such an emotional, life-changing experience. Our lives were forever changed and our hearts just melted instantly at the sight of our perfect, healthy baby.

He weighed 9lbs 5oz and was 21in long!

Nothing was more amazing than seeing Will become a father. He's a natural and I could see the love for Crew in his eyes instantly.

Will went out to the waiting room to tell our families the good news. This was their reaction when he told them how much Crew weighed.

My parents - aka Lolly & Poppy

Will's parents - aka Grangie and Gramps

Our favorite photographer and GREAT friend who documented Crew's birth. I was SO glad she was there for this life-changing moment. Look at these amazing photos we now have. This was a decision I'm so glad we made (and that Kelly agreed to) so that we could share the experience with our families. The photos turned out better than I could have imagined and I'm so grateful to Kelly for making that happen!

Our day went so smoothly and couldn't have gone better. We are so thankful that Crew was born without any complications and so healthy. I'll probably do another post on our hospital stay and recovery soon!

All photos courtesy of Kelly Ginn Photography